....
I didn’t grow up religious, but there are a couple things I
place all my faith in:
1. Being good feels good.
1. Being good feels good.
2. Being bad feels bad.
3. When you die, all the animals you’ve ever loved come
running to greet you.
Thinking about #3 has helped me through some dark days of
grief. Now, when I die and cross over to the other side, I have my arrival all
planned out.
Woody |
Woody will spot me first. Here on Earth, Woody used to lay inside
the door of my dad’s guitar shop, casting a stern gaze at all the passers-by. Each time
I approached the shop, he’d narrow his wary eyes … until I got close enough for him to
recognize me.
I’d wait for it … that precise, adorable moment when Woody spotted
me from afar. His whole expression would change. His alert ears would drop. His
squared shoulders would go soft. His eyes would go wide and bright as his mouth
opened in a doggie grin.
Yes, when I die, Woody will make his wiggly way toward me
first.
But Porter, my dear, angel Porter, won’t be far behind. When
Porter and I shared an apartment, he slept on a futon in the spare bedroom all
day while I was at work. I lived for the moment when I pushed open our back door
each day. Porter, waking with a start, would burst out of his bedroom, slide
sideways into view, then get tangled in his own Beagle feet as he did a quick, gleeful
pivot in the foyer.
One day, I’ll see him come tumbling into to view again …
then careen around the clouds, galloping, ears flapping, and diving into my
arms. I can’t wait to feel his stocky little body and bury my nose in his
turkey-dinner smell.
Porter |
(Oh Porter! I miss you most of all.)
Betty |
Betty and Nookie, the regal ladies, will bring up the rear. Betty
won’t be the crooked, sick old girl I said goodbye to. She’ll be the sleek,
athletic Husky who used to race me down grassy hills — thundering past me in a
joyful blur. That’s the Betty I’ll see again. Billy the brown dog, my first
love, will take his polite place in line, and sometimes, I feel like I can't even wait.
It breaks my heart to think of it now, as she sleeps beside
me, but by then, my beloved cat Firefly will be there too. Her health has been
failing, and every day seems like a bittersweet reason to celebrate. I don’t
want her to go, but when she does, I hope she waits for me, too.
I hope it with all my heart.